Saturday, May 31, 2008

Gen X

I know that some of my posts get repetitious. And i know i repeatedly address hot button issues. But for some reason, i like to grab the bull by the horns and just pull. It gives me a good challenge. And once again, i wanted to discuss schooling. For those of you who know me, you know that since 3rd grade, i was in public school. Yes, the big bad public education system. Now granted, perhaps i was in a very conservative area (right next to our high school, was "The Cloister", which is kinda like a community of Quakers lived back in the 1800's i think... i'll have to look into that more later on.. i apologize for my lack of research thus far.)

Also, as a side note, i want to add that i am not a parent as of current date. I've baby sat and spent much time w/ little kids. But i am not a parent so perhaps i don't have room to speak much here. So for those of you reading this who ARE parents, please understand that I am in no way trying to tell you how i think you should raise YOUR kids. That is between you and God. So please take this as from someone who has a heart to reach out to teens and teach and train them in the ways of the Lord. If the Lord has spoken to you about homeschooling and that is what you feel you are to do, by all means GO FOR IT! I most certainly want you to obey God in that.

And granted, i grew up in a very loving family. We talked things over as a family and dealt with the issues as they arose. (Train up a child in the way they should go and they will follow it all the days of their life.)

But in talking with many families, its like everyone is afraid of the public school system. They say their kids aren't ready for that yet... But yet those very same kids are ready to put themselves down in front of a tv screen for hours and play a video game or some movie. I mean, do we want to take over this world or not? I was talking w/ my mom the other day on the phone and she has a couple young ladies there at church that look to her for guidance. And i thought that was great! But i told her that if you ask them what they're dealing with, don't be surprised at what they may tell you. In my years of experience, kids at the age of 12 are dealing with stuff that i didn't have to deal with until i was 21.

Now, i know i have a very confrontational style to me. And i know that at times, i can be very abrasive (that may be an understatement). It's how God made me... lol. I don't mind getting down and dirty and dealing with things in life. And as always, you have to be careful in how you deal with them. Everyone is different. Some people like it very direct and point blank... others not so much. (Can you tell which one I am?) (Even in writing this, i want to choose my words very carefully and notice i'm not using very many exclamation marks at all.)

My main point in all of this is that the schools are a great way to get to kids, in a healthy way (for those of you who DON'T know me, i mean that in a very safe way.) But obviously, i want to be able to get into the schools somehow and show them the love of God. There are countless teens in there that are hurting and need Jesus and often times, just need a friend.

I can remember right after Columbine, there were rumors going around our school that there was going to be a shooting at our school. The day it was supposed to happen, you could've cut the fear with a knife! But I was there and just being me. (I know, scary thought, But i had to go, aside from wanting to be there. If i didn't go, there goes any hope for my witness.

I say its time to put God back in the schools. And parents and teachers are obviously very limited in what they can do. Teach your child and send them in. They're Special Forces. They'll get into places where others can't. It's time to take the high ground.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Well Digging...

This blog is dedicated to all those who have sewn into the great revivals of the past through tears and travail. May i not drop this torch, but carry on. May what i do in my life make your lives worth the price you paid.

The other day i was thinking about current life. I got to thinking about well digging... i'm going somewhere with this..

As to date, there is a healing revival going on in Lakeland, FL. I wouldn't mind going down, but i haven't really felt the release to go as of yet. I frankly don't care what others are saying about it. I have my own opinions about it. You can't really compare to other revivals (Toronto, Brownsville, Azusa Street) and some others because i don't know of two revivals that are all alike. And i realize that all these revivals were preceded by my prayer and travail and a people getting hungry for something other than just meetings.

I believe that this next move of God will be something soo much more. It will be built on relationships. It will be impacting to the next door neighbors. We can learn from past mistakes...

But i remember about 8 years ago, my friends and i started praying for a revival in our area back in Lancaster, PA. then we heard about Brownsville and headed down there to experience it. It was in the years following that we ran from conference to conference and all sorts of meetings. We wanted to experience God and His presence.

But in the past few years, i haven't been able to attend many conferences. Can't say is that i've wanted to. Reason being: i'm tired of running, i was to dig my own well and see God do something where I'm at. I get tired of church services like you wouldn't believe. Honestly i'm in a mode where i just want to leave unless i'm involved somehow. I frequently get asked to help minister at meetings. And i love to get prayed over by others, but i usually don't 'feel' a whole lot when i'm getting prayed for by others. but its usually just in the times of worship that i most get really touched by God.

I don't have a problem at all with people running to hot spots. Because as i've said before, i used to do all that. But now i'd like to dig my own well here and have people get and get touched and blessed here. I long to see the lost coming into relationship w/ God and the prodicals coming home, seeing the demon possessed/oppressed get freed and all that fun stuff.

But i just want to dig the well here and that way i don't have to keep running. It's not going to be easy probably. You can only run for soo long.

In any case, i just thought i'd put this out there and see what kind of feedback i get.

Lord, grant me the grace to persevere and even when times to rough to look to You to strength and sustenance.

PS- check out my blogspot at

Monday, May 26, 2008


I live in one of the cities where NASCAR is like a god. Not far from my house here is the Dale Earnhardt Memorial Trail. It's where he lived for a good portion of his life. I live about 10 minutes from the Lowe's Motor Speedway and our church has a building down almost literally right next door to the speedway (imagine the backyard bar b que's we could have w/ them...). And yet, through all of this, I wouldn't spend probably more than a day at this place. I'm just not a big NASCAR fan at all! Then again, i'm not a big pro sports fan at all. I'm pro salary caps at $50 annually. I'm sorry, but i don't see the justification in paying someone millions of dollar a year to drive a car around a track or get a ball through a hoop... i just have a hard time w/ the justification of it. To me, NASCAR truly is a Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks. That isn't to say anything bad about 'rednecks'. Not even sure where that term originated from....

But at least twice a year, here in Concord, NC, thousands of people descend upon the town here to watch a race. The speedway holds around 200,000 people and the grounds around the speedway are filled with visitors. And i've been in there about 2 times thus far. And you can hear the race from miles away. And since i used to work at Wal-Mart, during the time of the race, our beer sales would sky rocket.

Now, in their defense, i would like to mention that most of the race fans were actually some of the most enjoyable people to be around. They were laid back and just out to have a good time. So in that, i did somewhat like having them in town. They came in with their RV's and gave our town business.

But i was talking w/ a buddy of mine on the phone yesterday and he and his family were invited to a race at the nearby dirt track. (The dirt track and the actual speedway are two separate tracks. the speedway itself is where the major races take place and the dirt track are where some of the small ones are at.) But i know from experience that during the times of the race, you don't want to be driving anywhere near the speedway. Now, i will say this: during this time, FIRE does sell parking spots to race fans. so we do capitalize off of it. I'm not talking about $2-3 per spot, i'm talking like a minimum of $15 per spot. I told some of the guys in our church here who are from Canada and technically, they can't officially work. but i told them they should go and buy bottled water and resell it. You could buy a 12 pack of water and then resell it for $1/bottle. And trust me, people will pay it. (not to make a slant against some of the race fans, but some of them might be a little too drunk to know whats going.) ((As i mentioned earlier, these weeks aren't know for their times of when alcohol sales are down, but up.))

Throughout all of this, part of me would love to go and just walk around at the camp grounds down there and get to know people. My heart does break for them. Probably a good portion of them are folks w/o a Savior. This wouldn't be a time when i would just send a group of girls down there to minister, but go with a bunch of folks and just reach out to them. See what types of needs they have. All in all, it would be a great time to go check out the scene and see how we can be the more pro-active as far as Christendom goes.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Life at the monastery

Picture above: L to R is Jordan, Me and Joshua

Me and the Monks: Joshua on my left and Jordan on my right.

I love to try and pick up interesting titles for these blogspots. The reason i choose this one is because i currently live w/ two younger guys who their father and even them call them "The Monks". They like to live a very simple life. I thought I was conservative. But we frequently joke about that here.

Sometime ago, one of the leaders of FIRE Church, Steve Alt, preached a message here at FIRE about truly being a revolutionary people. I've been thinking about this lately. Our church is called FIRE Church and our school is FIRE School... whenever fire goes through an area, you tend to notice that its been there. It usually leaves a mark. In Steve's message, he made mention that we don't have to be offensive for the sake of being offensive. Simply our message with have a tone to it that can quite possibly do a number of different things.

The other day, i got an email from a very well intentioned relative. They had been reading my blogs and made mention that i seem to have a certain tone about the blogs. it seems that i'm quite critical at times. I wrote back and even called them up. I wanted to get more insight into what they were saying and understand them better. The hard part about writing something like this is you only see the words. When you don't know the heart behind it, it comes out differently. I know at times i come across strong and hard. And sometimes, that is needed. But done in the wrong spirit/attitude, it does come across wrong. but i appreciated the feedback that i got.

1. It would bring conviction. The difference between condemnation and conviction is that conviction brings hope. There is a purging a change that takes place, but overall, the person is edified and changed for the better. To be corrected usually never feels good at first, but in the end, it brings great results.

2. It could very well be misunderstood. In this email that my relative wrote to me, i could easily see what they were talking about. I know that i can come across very strong at times. And its because of that that i try and be very careful in what i say. I know that there is the power of life and death in the tongue. I try and be an encouragement and i also like to bring a challenge and something that brings about change.

Some people may read a book by Dr. Brown and get this impression that this guy is just mean. But once you get to know him, you'd probably be very surprised. I've brought differing view points to him in the past and they were very well received.

3. People will really like it. Something is happening in this day that is just different. The Lord is raising up a remnant to take a stand and see injustice dealt with. In my time at FIRE, i've been apart of countless prayer meetings and traveling all over the world and ministering the gospel. And mind you, i've never really seen a single penny for it coming to myself. And i don't mind that at all. I'm not in this to get paid. I'm in this to expand the Kingdom of God. We can't stick our head in the sand anymore and just ignore the problems in our society. I don't know about you, but i want to leave a legacy that says i took a stand for righteousness. And for each one of us, that's going to look different. For some, that means traveling and preaching/ministering. For some, that means raising kids and having travelers stay with you in your home for a couple days. Each is important.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Hope deferred...

"Makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life." Prov. 13:12. This the verse that we going through my head and on my heart on Sunday morning. As i've shared in the past about the last few years of my life, God hasn't let this whole thing about revival/revolution go. What will it look like? Who will be 'leading it'? That sort of thing...

But have you ever been let down or, as some might say, you got punked! Meaning you've had a joke pulled on you? Sometimes that how i feel... like i'm getting punked. now for clarification and for probably the 2 people who read this, i'm not giving up on God or anything like that. I don't have a right to be offended with God. For those of you who might think you actually have a right to be offended by God, i'll be bold for a second and tell you to grow up. I'll also tell you that no matter what you've gone through, Jesus can and will touch you and heal you of the hurts from the past.

"but you don't know what happened to me! you don't know how i was abused/neglected/whatever it may be!" your right, i don't. but Jesus does and His arms are wide open to heal you. He won't let you down like you may have been let down before by another human being.

But this past Sunday, as i was at church, i saw one of my old friends who i had gone through FIRE with. And they didn't seem like themself at all. They used to be very vibrant and energetic and going after God and evangelizing and all that stuff. Now, they're sitting there just very still. And it wasn't stillness before God... but it was probably that they had been hurt.

I've been to numerous different churches around the globe. Churches are made up of people and people do things at times that hurts others. I know, i've been in this type of situation. I've been hurt by people in the past. By well meaning friends and something happens and .... oops.

Just a side note, its kinda funny w/ the difference between men and women. Men, if they're mad at someone, they probably won't hide it. They'll just take them out back and beat the tar out of the person and 5 minutes later, they've forgotten all about it. Women let these things fester. And sometimes, the do the worst possible thing about acting like they really like each other! i'm just thinking "take it out back and deal with it already!" i'll go get you some boxing gloves....

But i'm sure that if your a living breathing human being, you've been hurt by someone or something. The worst possible thing you can do is act like nothing is the matter. That's just the dumbest thing! I'm speaking from experience. I wouldn't be soo adamant about something like this unless if i knew it were the truth. A good book i recommend to deal with an issue like this (other than the Bible) is called "The Bait of Satan" by John Bevere. It talks a lot about offenses being built up and hurts and how satan uses them against us.

In my history of counseling w/ people, i tell people to their face to do what they know is the right thing to do. (my thinking is is that if the person is coming to me, the worst thing i can do is just tickle their ears. nope, i confront the issue head on and just take it down.) It's not my job to tickle ears... its my job to get to the root of the problem and deal with the issue. its usually not easy nor fun... but it needs to be done.

I'm talking about this because just recently, i went through a session with one of my friends and i had some hurts from the past that needed to be dug up and dealt with. Granted, for someone like myself, i'm always my own worse critic. I like hard messages that challenge you and correct you. I like to get to the root of the matter and deal with it. Some of you don't... good luck w/ that. Just remember, gossip kills. Spiritual gossip as well... sometimes in talking w/ people, i have the stay vague about issues. The people i'm talking about don't necessarily need to know every detail. If its about me... sure, i'll share it. If its involving someone else though, details are left out.

In any case, satan will use just about anything he can to detract us from going after God. He'll use hurts that happen in church that make us decide to go to another church or avoid church altogether. If you ever find the perfect church, lemme know.

My original idea when deciding to write this was to talk about how at times, we can feel let down by things and that can lead to us dropping the sword and continuing to find in the name of the Lord. Because after the Lord dropped the verse in Proverbs, he directed me to Rom. 12:10-13. Sometimes, life is going to be a journey and its going to be rough. But its what we do with that that determines a lot. Are you going to be mad at God or mad at others? Or do you recognize a need for something more and be fervent in serving the Lord and committed a long haul?

Christianity is more than just attending meetings, its how you live your life. That may be faithful in your local church, and family (divorce is plain wrong and solves nothing) and job. But most importantly, its in loving Jesus and being faithful to him.

I realize that this turned into somewhat of a mini sermon... that wasn't necessarily my intention, but that's how it turned out. take it or leave it and test it.

peace out.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Send the Fire

Last night at church, we had a night amount of time just crying out to God. I was glad... because that's what i had on my heart to do. I didn't really want to hear another message (i'm kinda tired of hearing messages, although there is a time and place for preaching). but last night while gathered as a congregation to pray and seek the Lord for Him.

I know i mention the word 'revival' a lot on my blogspot. One concern i have is that it was just be a buzzword. And i know a lot of times, churches have a week set aside in the year for a revival. this is a topic that has been on my heart for years. I would probably say for a good 8+ years. A number of years ago, the Lord messed me up in such a way that i can't sit idly by. My heart yearns for a greater depths of the Lord and His working. It may not always feel like it or seem like it, but while on this planet, my heart burns to see Jesus made known.

in any case, my heart longs to see the Holy Spirit 'poured out' upon this earth. Sometime ago, the president of FIRE, Dr. Micheal Brown, wrote what he calls a 'sarcastic prayer for revival'. You have to understand before reading this that this is coming from a New York Messianic Jew.

"Prayer for a 'Nice' Revival"
Not too loud and not too long;
We want a nice revival.
Nothing heavy, weird or wild;
Our first goal is survival.

Make our church grow big, dear Lord;
Give us souls galore!
And bless our new faith budget, God;
That’s what revival’s for!

We’re praying and we’re fasting, Lord;
Please send Your Spirit in power.
And do whatever You see fit --
Just keep it to an hour!

Send the river, send the flood,
Send Your mighty rain.
Send Your glory down, O God:
It will be to our gain.

And now we close with this request;
We pray with heart and soul:
Send a great revival, Lord --
But leave us in control!

“Prayer for a ‘Nice’ Revival,” MLB

I've been in many different services where the presence of the Lord has been, probably what many would consider, unusually strong. Now, part of that bothers me that many might consider it strong. I don't like the idea of being able to play church. That's just boring. But real revival is messy. Forget about keeping the hair nice and combed and keeping the nice face on. It's going to mess you up. Some of you reading this know far better than i do about the reality of that. I've experienced a sliver of what some of you might have.

But last night, it just kinda felt weird. Not like in a bad way, but many are hearing about what's going on in Lakeland, Florida with Todd Bentley. I've watched numerous different viewings of it and his style is a bit different that what i like. But people are getting healed and saved. And their will be fruit from it and that's one of the best ways to judge it. But i went into the meeting last night and was like "God, i'm grateful for what your doing in Lakeland and i would love to go down there. But God, right now i can't. So Lord, do it here. Prepare my heart, mind and life for what your about to do.

May we always be vigilant and test what is going on by the Word of God. Not our own experiences and feelings. But if its a God thing, judge it according to the scriptures. And be careful what you ask for.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Happy Birthday Israel!

Happy Birthday Israel! And many more! I bless you as a nation and as a people in the name of Yeshua! May you reside in peace and joy.

Israel celebrated her 60th Birdthday on May 8th. Throughout the media we have been reminded how hard these 60 years have been, and how much the people of Israel had to sacrifice in order to have a country of their own in 2008. Many special guests are visiting Israel to celebrate together with us. Thousands of tourists also flooded the country to show their support of Israel and the Jewish people. Leaders of various countries around the world have congratulated Israel on her anniversary. The atmosphere here is special, and it seems that, even if just for a day, many people here have decided to stay away from criticism, voicing dissatisfaction and complaining. It's during these types of celebration that we can say without hesitation - "All Israel are Friends (Comrades)."

The Following are some articles from Dateline Israel, a news briefing i get.

During this special time we would like to share with you a couple of things that were forwarded to us and blessed us tremendously. The first one is a link to the video made 30 years ago, showing a conversation between Barbara Streisand and Golda Meir on Israel's 30th anniversary, with Barbara then singing the Israeli Anthem: The second is a power point made especially for Israel's 60th Birthday, which you can VIEW BY CLICKING HERE. (For best viewing save the file to your computer when prompted.)We hope you will be blessed just as we have been with these two exceptional resources.

By Katy Sorsher Smith

Today I already consider myself as one of the previous generation. At thirty I find that I am completely different - even from those in their early twenties, and truth be told - it really scares me. It seems that we have completely different values, as if we have been raised centuries apart. The younger ones seem to forget faster, and the voices rising up today from every direction surprisingly of the generation older than mine are promoting the growing ignorance of this and Google and MySpace generations.

How quickly does the world forget! How quickly the enemy raises up new opposition to the army of God! I was taught that we should never forget. Today’s generation is taught tolerance and acceptance which is nothing more but ignorance and apathy in my eyes. This self-consumed generation is easily swept by propaganda and words that are pleasant to their ears. You don’t have to search for it what I call 'The Obama Phenomenon' is self-explanatory.

But I am determined to never forget. And not only today, Holocaust Memorial Day, but every day!

My anger is stirred up every time someone even as much as entertains the thought of the severity of the holocaust being exaggerated and so much more when people outwardly and without shame deny it ever happened!

Sadly, these voices are growing louder and louder while the voices of survivors are getting thinner and thinner - as every year less and less of them remain to tell about the horrors of what humanity put them through. But if you've talked to a survivor once in your life, if they let your fingers slide on their skin where the numbers are engraved forever leaving their mark, you will not be able to forget.

The headlines of Israeli newspapers online were filled with anti-Semitism this past week:

Ukraine started selling Hitler dolls, and the manufacturer says they consider them to be in the same category as Barbie dolls! More products like these dolls will follow, depending on the sales. 'The Hitler figurine features moveable arms that enable it to reproduce the Nazi dictator's infamous salute, and consumers are able to choose from a variety of outfits, including "early days Adolf" and "wartime Adolf".’ (Ynet News, 4/26/08)

A Jewish leader in Germany this week suggested that the ban on selling Hitler’s book, Mein Kampf, should be lifted, also saying it should be published and available to everyone online. His suggestions have been, thank God, rejected - at least for now.

To top this, Jean-Marie Le Pen, infamous for his remarks about the Holocaust, now says that gas chambers in Auschwitz and other death camps did not exist, and that the prisoners were merely workers in these labor camps. If I could, I would dare him look in the eyes of a survivor from one of the camps and say that.

How can anyone stay apathetic to these remarks and not speak against them? Well, most of us don’t, even though I think we should. One voice is, of course, just one voice, but if joined together, we will be heard!

However, this generation does not seem to care. Totally consumed by their own desires they simply choose NOT to remember. Well, not only them. We, too, seem to forget, or sometimes bluntly ignore the fact that there are people today determined to wipe off the face of the earth other people they don’t like… We seem to dismiss the fact that a leader openly says he wants to wipe Israel off the map. Do we really think he’s just being misunderstood or is making empty threats?

Will we again remain silent and hide behind “God will have His way anyway?”
We should never forget! We should never allow this again! Our children and their children (should the Lord tarry) should never forget either.

When the alarm sounded in Israel this morning, every person, every student, every child stood silently in Honor of the victims of Holocaust. Let’s remember with them. Let’s remember not just today but every day! Let’s fight the enemy with prayer and intercession for Israel. Let’s petition our Lord and Savior to plea with the Father to fight again for Israel, asking Him what can we personally do.


Personal Note: There were a few pictures that i couldn't carry over from my email. And another side note... why is it soo much to ask for people to start recognizing Israel and the Holocaust? If they want to deny that, why not just deny the Pearl Harbor or some other major disaster?