Hope deferred...

"Makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life." Prov. 13:12. This the verse that we going through my head and on my heart on Sunday morning. As i've shared in the past about the last few years of my life, God hasn't let this whole thing about revival/revolution go. What will it look like? Who will be 'leading it'? That sort of thing...

But have you ever been let down or, as some might say, you got punked! Meaning you've had a joke pulled on you? Sometimes that how i feel... like i'm getting punked. now for clarification and for probably the 2 people who read this, i'm not giving up on God or anything like that. I don't have a right to be offended with God. For those of you who might think you actually have a right to be offended by God, i'll be bold for a second and tell you to grow up. I'll also tell you that no matter what you've gone through, Jesus can and will touch you and heal you of the hurts from the past.

"but you don't know what happened to me! you don't know how i was abused/neglected/whatever it may be!" your right, i don't. but Jesus does and His arms are wide open to heal you. He won't let you down like you may have been let down before by another human being.

But this past Sunday, as i was at church, i saw one of my old friends who i had gone through FIRE with. And they didn't seem like themself at all. They used to be very vibrant and energetic and going after God and evangelizing and all that stuff. Now, they're sitting there just very still. And it wasn't stillness before God... but it was probably that they had been hurt.

I've been to numerous different churches around the globe. Churches are made up of people and people do things at times that hurts others. I know, i've been in this type of situation. I've been hurt by people in the past. By well meaning friends and something happens and .... oops.

Just a side note, its kinda funny w/ the difference between men and women. Men, if they're mad at someone, they probably won't hide it. They'll just take them out back and beat the tar out of the person and 5 minutes later, they've forgotten all about it. Women let these things fester. And sometimes, the do the worst possible thing about acting like they really like each other! i'm just thinking "take it out back and deal with it already!" i'll go get you some boxing gloves....

But i'm sure that if your a living breathing human being, you've been hurt by someone or something. The worst possible thing you can do is act like nothing is the matter. That's just the dumbest thing! I'm speaking from experience. I wouldn't be soo adamant about something like this unless if i knew it were the truth. A good book i recommend to deal with an issue like this (other than the Bible) is called "The Bait of Satan" by John Bevere. It talks a lot about offenses being built up and hurts and how satan uses them against us.

In my history of counseling w/ people, i tell people to their face to do what they know is the right thing to do. (my thinking is is that if the person is coming to me, the worst thing i can do is just tickle their ears. nope, i confront the issue head on and just take it down.) It's not my job to tickle ears... its my job to get to the root of the problem and deal with the issue. its usually not easy nor fun... but it needs to be done.

I'm talking about this because just recently, i went through a session with one of my friends and i had some hurts from the past that needed to be dug up and dealt with. Granted, for someone like myself, i'm always my own worse critic. I like hard messages that challenge you and correct you. I like to get to the root of the matter and deal with it. Some of you don't... good luck w/ that. Just remember, gossip kills. Spiritual gossip as well... sometimes in talking w/ people, i have the stay vague about issues. The people i'm talking about don't necessarily need to know every detail. If its about me... sure, i'll share it. If its involving someone else though, details are left out.

In any case, satan will use just about anything he can to detract us from going after God. He'll use hurts that happen in church that make us decide to go to another church or avoid church altogether. If you ever find the perfect church, lemme know.

My original idea when deciding to write this was to talk about how at times, we can feel let down by things and that can lead to us dropping the sword and continuing to find in the name of the Lord. Because after the Lord dropped the verse in Proverbs, he directed me to Rom. 12:10-13. Sometimes, life is going to be a journey and its going to be rough. But its what we do with that that determines a lot. Are you going to be mad at God or mad at others? Or do you recognize a need for something more and be fervent in serving the Lord and committed a long haul?

Christianity is more than just attending meetings, its how you live your life. That may be faithful in your local church, and family (divorce is plain wrong and solves nothing) and job. But most importantly, its in loving Jesus and being faithful to him.

I realize that this turned into somewhat of a mini sermon... that wasn't necessarily my intention, but that's how it turned out. take it or leave it and test it.

peace out.